How to be a good colleague: The leadership of everyday kindness

Keith Power
18 hours ago
2 min read

In every workplace, there’s a quiet kind of leadership that doesn’t come with a title or a corner office. It’s found in the colleague who notices when someone’s voice trembles in a meeting, who checks in after a tough day, or who offers a kind word that makes a heavy load just a little lighter.

Being a good colleague isn’t about being the loudest supporter or the most cheerful team player, it’s about awareness, empathy, and courage. It’s about creating space for others to feel seen and safe.

Spotting the signs when someone is struggling

Not everyone who’s struggling shows it openly. Some overcompensate with humour, some withdraw, and others become unusually quiet or irritable. The signs are often subtle:

A dip in energy or engagement.
Increased mistakes or indecision.
Avoiding social interactions.
Overworking or under-communicating.

When you notice these changes, it doesn’t mean you have to “fix” anything. Sometimes it’s enough to gently say, “Hey, you seem a bit off, everything okay?”Those simple words can make the difference between isolation and connection.

As a coach, I’ve seen how powerful it is when someone feels noticed without being judged. It’s a reminder that empathy is not weakness it’s awareness in action.

Modelling Psychological Safety

Psychological safety isn’t just a leadership strategy, it’s a culture we each contribute to daily. It’s built in small, consistent acts:

Listening without interrupting.
Admitting your own mistakes.
Inviting diverse opinions - and really meaning it.
Giving credit publicly and feedback privately.

When we model this behaviour, we make it easier for others to do the same. We show that trust and openness aren’t management slogans, they’re choices we make in every interaction.

And when people feel safe, they don’t just perform better - they think more creatively, share ideas more freely, and build stronger bonds.

Leadership beyond the job title

Leadership is not defined by hierarchy; it’s defined by influence and intention. The colleague who takes time to ask, listen, or encourage is often doing more to shape the culture than those at the top. Every time you show up with kindness and curiosity, you’re demonstrating leadership in its truest form - leading with humanity.

A coaching lesson: Be present, not perfect

In coaching, we often talk about the power of presence - being fully with the person in front of you. You don’t need all the answers. What matters is the quality of your attention.

Try this simple framework next time you sense someone might be struggling:

Notice - Observe changes without assuming.
Reach Out - Ask how they’re doing, sincerely and privately.
Listen - Give them space to talk, without rushing to respond.
Encourage - Offer reassurance or support, however small.

It’s the same approach great leaders and great colleagues share - meeting people where they are.

Final Thought

Workplaces thrive not just on performance, but on compassion. Being a good colleague doesn’t mean taking on everyone’s burdens; it means creating moments of light when things get heavy. If each of us took responsibility for one act of care a day, we’d all be working in psychologically safer, more human organisations.

Leadership isn’t always about leading others forward; sometimes, it’s about walking beside them.